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Gerard de VosCreated by Gerard de Vos
on 05-03-2009
Category: Christ related
Why does God love marriages?

According to the Bible, right in the beginning, on the sixth day, God created man and woman. Adam was created first, but it was not good that he was alone. Then the woman was created. She was his equal and together they would become one. They would fill the earth by producing children. The interesting question is why did God not fill the earth immediately? Why did He think it right to make a man and a woman, who would become one in marriage, and thus be fruitful and enjoy each others company?

God, planned meticulously. He knew exactly what He was going to accomplish. Right in the beginning, in Genesis 2 with the marriage, He gave us the blue print of what would eventually happen in Revelation 19. In chapter 19:6 and 7 we find the description of a great roar as the saved applaud God and give Him glory, for the wedding of the Lamb has come, and the bride has made herself ready. What we understand is that the Lamb, Jesus will be the Bridegroom, and the church, the saved, will be the bride.

Why did God plan a marriage? In other words, why will the final structure in heaven be the Father, and the Son as Bridegroom, married to the Bride? The answer is easy: a sense of unity is more easily experienced in a family that in a large group of people. A family lives in much closer relationship with each other, than a group. Peace, love, and loyalty is easier in a family than a group. God’s design is an eternal reign of peace, love and loyalty. He knew that the family structure would be a much stronger one than a group of people. He knew it since He designed the marriage structure which is characterized by a jealous love. Marriage doesn’t brook interference from a third party. This is what God planned for eternity: complete loyalty and a jealous love. We cannot forget that God’s planning is eternal. (He experienced the devil’s rebellion, and Judas’ betrayal of Jesus. He planned beforehand that it would not happen again.) Marriage was also designed to be about a close companionship with communication, and love. Love is not something that can be feigned. Real love is easily detectable, and one of the characteristics is the desire to be with the partner. These are all things that God pre planned for the eternal marriage.

What does this mean for the believer?

  • We will all be part of the bride. Just as the body has millions of different cells that all contribute to the working of the body, so we are all part of Jesus’ bride, important and functional. We are not saved and elected to be part of the bride, to sit around and do nothing. God is not a lazy God, so we do not have to fear that we will sit and sing for millions of years. We will cultivate the earth.
  • We do not become a potential part of the bride by sticking to external rules. God wants fellowship, love and communication. This happens mainly through words, and for this reason He gave us His book, His letter to us. If we do not read it, if we do not depend on the Holy Spirit to apply and teach it to us for our individual circumstances, then we have no contact with the Bridegroom. It is not often that some one marries a complete stranger. God is not into that type of thing. He is not taking chances, but is preparing us properly to become His Son’s bride. We will not arrive in heaven at the marriage feast and Jesus is a complete stranger. If we do not get to know Him, we won’t be there.
  • Marriage means loyalty. Just as no normal marriage likes interference, so God will not allow it. For this reason we are constantly commanded not to consort with demons or idols. They fill the same role as a third party in a marriage: trouble.
  • Cells in a body have different functions. So it is with the individual members. We cannot belong to a church and just sit there. Just as a non functional cell is dead and is discarded by the body, so the lazy believer is treading on dangerous ground. We are to develop our gifts from God so that we can serve our Bridegroom.
  • In marriage, for the sake of order, the wife is to submit to the husband. This doesn’t imply that the husband is superior, since Christ is also submitted to God. It all has to do with order, just as many departmental heads or bosses are not necessarily the cleverest or most gifted, but for the sake of order everybody else is under their command and reports to them. In the church, the future bride, this is the same. Many people have the mistaken idea that they can do as they wish, since they are saved. This is a fallacy, as we can almost compare salvation to engagement. Not married yet, and it can be broken off, but the prospect is there. A Christian who lives an independent life, who loves the world, and seldom finds out what Jesus is saying to him through the Bible, is walking on extremely thin ice.
  • In a marriage, it is not the husband or the wife, but the good of the family that is important. So God goes to a lot of trouble to cultivate the spirit of humility, submission, cooperation, love and respect for each other.
  • The physical relationship between a husband and wife is important. It is the difference between the animal world and humans. God gave it for enjoyment, children, and to strengthen the mutual bond between the two. This is to show that just as man is in woman, so God is in us through the Holy Spirit. This is not a once off thing, the Holy Spirit is continually in us, and for a reason: He knows us, He can help and guide us. Neglecting Him is dangerous, as it is clear ‘if anyone does not have the Spirit of Christ, he does not belong to Christ,’ (Romans 8: 9b).


We must understand that just as an engagement can still be broken off, God has given us an engagement period. That is between our salvation and the day we depart this life. During this time we are tested, disciplined, and taught perseverance. God has to know whether we love Him with all our hearts, our souls, our minds and our strength. Nothing less than that will suffice. A person who is not in this training school of God has to realize his danger. Jesus said on more than one occasion that to become a lover or follower of Him is not an easy way. He doesn’t make it easy, since He wants to know whether He spilt His blood for a good cause. Does the specific person regard salvation as very unimportant. This giving of Himself for us to save us from the clutches of the devil is very important. If we do not value it highly enough and understand it well, it is doubtful whether we will really invest with all our might into this wonderful venture that God has prepared for us.



"But God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise; God chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong.” 1 Corinth 1:27